An Old Lady Asked About Her New Neighbor. But When He Told His Story? Yikes

Ruth and Gilda, two elderly widows, are curious about the latest arrival in their neighborhood – a quiet, nice-looking gentleman who keeps to himself. 

Gilda says, “Ruth, you know I’m shy. Why don’t you go talk to him at the park and find out a little about him. He looks so lonely.”

Ruth agrees, and later that day at the park, she walks up to him and says, “Excuse me, mister. I hope I’m not prying, but my friend and I were wondering why you looked so lonely.”

“Of course I’m lonely, he says, “I’ve spent the past 20 years in prison.”

“You’re kidding! What for?” asks Ruth, aghast.

“For killing my third wife. I strangled her.”

“What happened to your second wife?”

“I shot her.”

“And, if I may ask, your first wife?”

“We had a fight and she fell off a building.”

“Oh my,” says Ruth. 

Then turning to her friend at the other end of the park, she calls, “Yoohoo, Gilda! He’s single.”